1
MEL BAKERSFELD
Joe, this is Mel. There's no more time. Stop all engines and get out. Repeat. Stop all engines.
COCKPIT QUALIFIED YOUNG MAN
Mr. Patroni, she won't take much more.
JOE PATRONI
Well anyway, she's gonna get it.
MEL BAKERSFELD
Joe, the plows are moving. Shut down and hold on! Joe Patroni! Do you read me? Acknowledge!
MEL BAKERSFELD
Joe! Shut down!
COCKPIT QUALIFIED YOUNG MAN
Mr. Patroni? Don't you hear him? Shut down.
JOE PATRONI
I can't hear a thing. There's too much noise. Hold on. We're GOIN FOR BROKE!
COCKPIT QUALIFIED YOUNG MAN
[after the plane gets out of the ditch] The instruction book said that was impossible.
JOE PATRONI
That's one nice thing about the 707. It can do everything BUT read. [throws his chewed and soggy cigar over his shoulder]
1
JOE PATRONI
Hold the whipped cream; I just had a dessert.
0
JOE PATRONI
Okay. But you keep those dinky toys out of my hair and away from this plane for 15 minutes, maybe less. I'll DRIVE it out.
0
JOE PATRONI
I'll be back in time if I have to pull that plane out with my teeth!
0
JOE PATRONI
Well, let's put it *this* way- You promised me a box of cigars if I pull this off, right?
MEL BAKERSFELD
Yeh-uh
JOE PATRONI
Well, whataya standin' *there* for? Go GET 'em!
0
ASSISTANT
The instruction book said that was impossible!
JOE PATRONI
That's one nice thing about the 707. She can do everything but read.
0
JOE PATRONI
You chickened out on me! I told you I wanted all the power you got!
CAPT. BENSON
Full throttle and this plane would be standing on its nose.
JOE PATRONI
You might fly these things but I take them apart and put them back together again. If you had any guts we'd be on the runway by now.
CAPT. BENSON
You felt it vibrating? Another 10 seconds and we'd have had structural damage.
JOE PATRONI
Who do ya think you're talking to, some kid that fixes bicycles? I know every inch of the 707! Take the wings off this and you could use it as a TANK! This plane is built to withstand anything... except a bad pilot.
CAPT. BENSON
You might tell your mechanic that I've got three million miles in the air.
JOE PATRONI
And two and a half feet into the ground
0
JOE PATRONI
Aww, a tractor-trailer jack-knifed and flipped over. It's laying on its side like a drunken dinosaur.
0
JOE PATRONI
They don't call them emergencies anymore. They call them Patronis.
0
JOE PATRONI
The sudden decompression at 30,000 feet is something you gotta see to believe.
TANYA LIVINGSTON
He'll get sucked out, won't he?
JOE PATRONI
So will anyone sittin' next to him. Until that pressure equalizes, everything within 20 feet of him that's not nailed down or strapped in is gonna get sucked right out of that hole.
BERT WEATHERBY
Is it that powerful, are you sure?
JOE PATRONI
Yeah, I'm sure. When I was a mechanic in the Air Force, I was being transferred on a MATS plane. At 20,000 feet, one of the windows shattered. The guy sitting next to it was about 170 pounds. He went through that little space like a hunk of hamburger going down a disposal, and right after him coats, pillows, blankets, cups, saucers. Yeah, I'm sure.
MEL BAKERSFELD
Takes about 3 seconds, doesn't it?
JOE PATRONI
3, 4 or 5, depends on the size of the hole. Everything fogs up just like that. [Snaps fingers] And THEN watch out! At that altitude, you can't breathe. So unless they get on oxygen in 45 seconds, it's good-bye!