TRIP MCNEELY [as he approaches a sulking Mike with a six-pack in hand] Hey man, you want a beer?

MIKE DEXTER Trip McNeely!

TRIP MCNEELY Trip McNeely.

MIKE DEXTER No way, man!

MIKE DEXTER Trip McNeely! Geez. You were a sexual icon! You know girls at Huntington still talk about you?

TRIP MCNEELY Really? Which ones?

MIKE DEXTER You must be racking up at college. College!

TRIP MCNEELY I wish, bro. I can't even get digits as a freshman.

MIKE DEXTER Shut up! Come on, you can tell me.

TRIP MCNEELY Seriously, man. I thought college was gonna be a 24-7 orgy. Hell, that's even why I broke up with Janeen before I left.

MIKE DEXTER [after an uneasy pause] S-so, what happened?

TRIP MCNEELY [sighs] College chicks are totally different, bro. They're all serious and shit. They all talk about world issues and "ecolomological" crap. They all wanna date older guys. [Tosses an empty beer can aside]

MIKE DEXTER Yeah, but... not all of 'em, right?

TRIP MCNEELY Way it goes. Hell, I even tried crawling back to Janeen. She was all cozy with some senior. He's a pre-med. They ALL are. Guys like us... we are a dime a dozen. [Belches and then chuckles] Speaking of which, you still with that Amanda chick? She was a prize piece if I ever saw one.

MIKE DEXTER [Lying to Trip] Yeah, [Scoffs] me and Amanda. Definitely. Yep.

TRIP MCNEELY You're lucky, bro.

MIKE DEXTER I sure am.

TRIP MCNEELY Stay with her. It's the best advice I can give you. [Farts] Oh, that, and bring rubber flip-flops in the shower. I got warts all over my feet. [Leaves]

MIKE DEXTER [With a discouraged tone] Take it easy, Trip! Trip McNeely! All right...