7
AUNT BETHANY
Is Rusty still in the navy?
5
ELLEN
Oh Aunt Bethany, you shouldn't have done that.
AUNT BETHANY
Oh dear, did I break wind?
UNCLE LEWIS
Jesus, did the room clear out, Bethany? Hell no, she means presents. You shouldn't have brought presents.
2
AUNT BETHANY
Is this the airport, Clark?
1
AUNT BETHANY
What's that sound? You hear it? It's a funny squeaky sound.
UNCLE LEWIS
You couldn't hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerin plant.
-1
CLARK
Since this is Aunt Bethany's 80th Christmas, I think she should lead us in the saying of Grace.
AUNT BETHANY
[turns to Lewis] What, dear?
NORA GRISWOLD
Grace!
AUNT BETHANY
Grace? She passed away thirty years ago.
UNCLE LEWIS
They want you to say Grace. [Bethany shakes her head in confusion] The BLESSING!
AUNT BETHANY
[they all pose for prayer] I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands/ One nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
CLARK
Amen.