3
COUNTESS VERA ROSSAKOFF
So, you are saying the police cannot solve it because they're too English.
HERCULE POIROT
Or because the culprit, he is not English enough.
2
CAPTAIN HASTINGS
Isn't it bracing, Poirot?
HERCULE POIROT
Bracing, Hastings?
CAPTAIN HASTINGS
The weather.
HERCULE POIROT
No, it is cold and wet. Did you know, Hastings, that the earth is cooling at a rate of three degrees every twelve thousand years?
CAPTAIN HASTINGS
No, I didn't know that, no.
HERCULE POIROT
Ah.
CAPTAIN HASTINGS
Still, beautiful fountain, isn't it?
HERCULE POIROT
It's feeble, Hastings. Fountains used to be more vigorous. Artistic too.
CAPTAIN HASTINGS
I don't know what's wrong with you today, Poirot. Nothing seems good enough for you.
HERCULE POIROT
I am finished, Hastings.
CAPTAIN HASTINGS
Finished?
HERCULE POIROT
Yes. I shall retire, I think.
CAPTAIN HASTINGS
But you're at the height of your powers, Poirot.
HERCULE POIROT
You are being kind, Hastings.
CAPTAIN HASTINGS
No, I'm not. Well, you've got a nice home, uh, devoted friends, a brilliant career.
HERCULE POIROT
No no no, mon ami. I am nothing. I have nothing. Poirot is finished.
1
ELLIE HENDERSON
It was a cruel, dirty trick you played, Monsieur Poirot.
HERCULE POIROT
I do not approve of murder. Mademoiselle.
1
COUNTESS VERA ROSSAKOFF
And what of the perfect crime?
HERCULE POIROT
It is an illusion, Countess.
1
JESMOND
I must apologize for the prince, Monsieur Poirot. He is, uh...
HERCULE POIROT
Young? One is never to young to learn the manners!
JESMOND
Indeed, indeed. Unfortunately, the prince has never seen any reason to do so.
1
HERCULE POIROT
You know, Hastings, the worst kind of fanatic is the quiet, unobtrusive fanatic.
FINGLER
And the worst kind of customer is the customer who can't keep still.
HERCULE POIROT
Monsieur Fingler, this jacket it is too tight.
FINGLER
Oh, it is too tight, is it?
HERCULE POIROT
Yes, I shall scarcely be able to button it up.
FINGLER
Do you know why it is too tight?
HERCULE POIROT
Because you made it too small.
FINGLER
No no no no. Because you have grown too big. This jacket has been made by *last* year's measurements. Now are we having a fitting or what!
HERCULE POIROT
A fitting by all means, Monsieur Fingler.
1
HERCULE POIROT
[reading a brochure for a fitness program] 'Use your vigour to keep your figure.' Absurd! There is nothing wrong with the body of Poirot. He is in the peak of condition!
1
HERCULE POIROT
Certainment, this is the most difficult moment of my career. To solve the crime... that does not exist.
1
HERCULE POIROT
[to Japp, referring to Hastings' new camera] The new toy. I give it two, perhaps three weeks.
1
HECTOR MACQUEEN
[talking about his father] Casseti's connections threatened to kill me - his son - if he didn't do what they asked! Wha... what was he supposed to do?
HERCULE POIROT
He was supposed to have ensured that justice was done in an open court, monsieur.