10
JESSE PINKMAN
You got something for me?
SKINNY PETE
Yeah, I found 'em.
JESSE PINKMAN
Is this a five or an S?
SKINNY PETE
Five, yo. No wait...S. No, no...yeah, five.
JESSE PINKMAN
Yeah? Jesus, how the hell do you spell "street" wrong? S-T-R-E-A-T?
SKINNY PETE
Hey, man, I'm slingin' mad volume and fat stackin' benjis, you know what I'm sayin'? I can't be all about, like, spelling and shit.
JESSE PINKMAN
Okay. So they got names?
SKINNY PETE
Hers is like, I dunno, she's just his woman is all. Him, they call Spooge.
JESSE PINKMAN
Spooge? Not Mad Dog? Not Diesel? So lemme get this straight, you got jacked by a guy named Spooge?
10
WALTER WHITE
We're not going to need pseudoephedrine. We're going to make phenylacetone in a tube furnace, then we're going to use reductive amination to yield methamphetamine. Four pounds.
JESSE PINKMAN
So no pseudo?
WALTER WHITE
No pseudo.
JESSE PINKMAN
So you do have a plan! Yeah Mr. White! Yeah science!
10
WALTER WHITE
[whispering to Jesse what to say to Hank] Private domicile and I won't be harassed.
HANK
Yeah? Tell you what Pinkman, probable cause or no, I'll give you three seconds to get your ass out here! 1, 2...
JESSE PINKMAN
This is my own private domicile and I will not be harassed...bitch!
9
JESSE PINKMAN
Did you know that there's an acceptable level of rat turds that can go into candy bars? It's the government, jack. Even government doesn't care that much about quality. You know what is okay to put in hot dogs? Huh? Pig lips and assholes. But I say, hey, have at it bitches 'cause I love hot dogs.
9
JESSE PINKMAN
Possum. Big, freaky, lookin' bitch. Since when did they change it to opossum? When I was comin' up it was just possum. Opossum makes it sound like he's irish or something. Why do they gotta go changing everything?
9
WALTER WHITE
So what happens now?
JESSE PINKMAN
What happens now? I'll tell you what happens now. Your scumbag brother-in-law is finished. Done. You understand? I will own him when this is over. Every cent he earns, every cent his wife earns is mine. Any place he goes, anywhere he turns, I'm gonna be there grabbing my share. He'll be scrubbing toilets in Tijuana for pennies and I'll be standing over him to get my cut. He'll see me when he wakes up in the morning and when he crawls to sleep in whatever rat hole is left for him after I shred his house down. I will haunt his crusty ass forever until the day he sticks a gun up his mouth and pulls the trigger just to get me out of his head. That's what happens next.
7
JESSE PINKMAN
Jane, I gotta say, this place is awesome!
JANE MARGOLIS
Really? Does it inspire awe?
7
JESSE PINKMAN
Yo, why would you want this lame ass job anyway? I mean, no offense.
BADGER
Because I'm on probation, yo. Gotta prove to the man I'm rehabilitated. [smokes a joint]
6
JESSE PINKMAN
Oh, seriously? Where are you two going?
BADGER
Jesse, I've been awake for like three straight days. Turning into a Sleestak.
JESSE PINKMAN
So crash here. It's not like I ain't got the space.
BADGER
Yeah, that's cool and all, but I think I got like this cat? Think I'm like supposed to feed it.
6
WALTER WHITE
Three entire bags of Funyuns?
JESSE PINKMAN
Funyuns are awesome.
WALTER WHITE
God...
JESSE PINKMAN
More for me.
WALTER WHITE
How about something with some protein, maybe? Something green, huh? How are you even alive?