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TROY BARNES
Candy corn looks like tiny traffic cones.
ABED NADIR
Yeah, it sure does.
TROY BARNES
At like a candy traffic school. Like a little gingerbread man at the wheel. And he's drunk!
ABED NADIR
Look out!
TROY BARNES
We drivin'. But you keep wantin' to eat yourself.
ABED NADIR
All day.
TROY BARNES
That's one of my biggest fears.
ABED NADIR
What is?
TROY BARNES
If I ever, like, woke up as a donut...
ABED NADIR
You would eat yourself?
TROY BARNES
I wouldn't even question it.
TROY BARNES
That's one of my biggest fears.
ABED NADIR
Mmm. That'd be tasty.
TROY BARNES
It's cool to know other people think about this stuff, too.
ABED NADIR
Yeah. Yeah.
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TROY BARNES
[talking about the paintball competition] What's the prize?
DEAN PELTON
It was a DVD Blu-Ray player but it was stolen, so now it's TBD.
TROY BARNES
I want TBD. Is that new?
PIERCE HAWTHORNE
if it's what I think I had it for a month in the seventies.
0
TROY BARNES
I'm a dracula.
ABED NADIR
You mean a vampire?
TROY BARNES
I don't need to know which dracula I am to be a dracula. Nerd.
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ANNIE EDISON
Well, the real important thing is that there is a Model U.N., it doesn't really matter who starts it. It just means her name goes on some charter and she gets to put it on her resume, and lead the Greendale team to the national Model U.N., and meet Kofi Annan, Boutros Boutros-Ghali, and will.i.am.
TROY BARNES
[Excited] Boutros Boutros-Ghali?!
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JEFF WINGER
Oh, look, Indiana Jones and the apartment of perpetual virginity.
TROY BARNES
Haha! Chop busted, fellow adult. Chop busted.
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BRITTA PERRY
You've got a bowl of olives next to the toilet?
TROY BARNES
It's a fancy party, Britta.
0
TROY BARNES
How did we get the short straw?
ABED NADIR
It's not a short straw. It's a hot potato.
TROY BARNES
Yeah, well, it looks pretty cold to me.
ABED NADIR
Cold or dead?.
TROY BARNES
Survey says...
ABED NADIR
We can't both do the zinger.
0
TROY BARNES
My whole brain is crying!
0
TROY BARNES
You thinking what I'm thinking?
SHIRLEY BENNETT
Mmm-hmm. Our team's walking with God.
TROY BARNES
I'm thinking we may already be the only seven left. In which case, this is a window for the two of us to take out the others.
SHIRLEY BENNETT
Real nice, Troy. That would great PR for the black students.
TROY BARNES
I'm not an ambassador. I am a gladiator. Now, do you want to win or not?
SHIRLEY BENNETT
Troy made God mad!
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PIERCE HAWTHORNE
Troy, what you did took guts. I'm impressed.
TROY BARNES
Thanks Pierce.
PIERCE HAWTHORNE
And such a creative way to tell the world you're gay.