DAN RYDELL I mixed up! I inverted the definitions of "secular" and "nonsecular"!

CASEY MCCALL Looks like that might be the case.

DAN RYDELL Hilary Clinton thinks I'm an idiot!

CASEY MCCALL Either that or a religious bigot.

DAN RYDELL I went to an Ivy League school, Casey.

CASEY MCCALL A proud day for Dartmouth, Dan.

CASEY MCCALL You have a crush on Hillary Clinton.

DAN RYDELL I carry a torch for her, yes.

CASEY MCCALL You're hot for Mrs. Clinton.

DAN RYDELL Well, who isn't? But in my case it's more than physical. It's cerebral.

CASEY MCCALL No doubt about it. I think we need to get you a CAT scan. And stat.

DAN RYDELL I would like to have an intelligent, high-minded, right-thinking, socially progressive, impressively pragmatic conversation with Hillary Clinton. Tomorrow morning I shall.

CASEY MCCALL Shall you?

DAN RYDELL Yes. And she will say, "My goodness. That Dan Rydell is such a bright young boy, so much more than sports scores and highlights. I think I'll make him my gentleman friend."

CASEY MCCALL Well, then, here's to you Mrs. Robinson.

CASEY MCCALL You are about five different kinds of crazy, you know that?

CASEY MCCALL Was there a stripper?

DANA WHITAKER At the party?

CASEY MCCALL Yeah.

DANA WHITAKER Yes, there was.

CASEY MCCALL Did he have a better body than me?

DANA WHITAKER Of course he had a better body than you, Casey. He was a professional male stripper.

CASEY MCCALL You know, let me tell you something. When we're asked, men know how to answer that question.

DAN RYDELL Hillary Clinton thinks I'm an idiot!

CASEY MCCALL Either that or a religious bigot.

DAN RYDELL I went to an Ivy League school, Casey.

CASEY MCCALL Proud day for Dartmouth, Dan.

DAN RYDELL I made an idiot out of myself in front of Hillary Clinton!

CASEY MCCALL Yeah, but at least you had to spend a thousand bucks to do it.

CASEY MCCALL I'm known in some parts for my first date. In certain parts I have a rep. There's such a thing as street cred, Dan.

DAN RYDELL Listen to this.

CASEY MCCALL Tell them about my street cred.

DAN RYDELL Haha, seriously.

CASEY MCCALL Tell them about my rep.

DAN RYDELL You don't have a rep, you don't have street cred. Your last date was 14 years ago and you ended up with marriage and a divorce.

CASEY MCCALL In some parts.

DAN RYDELL There are no parts.

SAM DONOVAN You shouldn't think that just because I'm looking at you while you're talking to me, that I'm necessarily listening to or caring about what you're saying. It's just something I do to be polite.